It is almost 4pm over here in Belgium and I am tired as hell. I was trying to get some things done and I DID. I love feeling satisfied and accomplished at the little things like when you get your house cleaned, do errands that you wrote down. See I am a GREAT list maker, all organized and planned. BUT over the last 4 months being over here I do not seem to get my lists done. This is how OCD I make my list. For those of you who don't know I am trying to better myself. How so?? Well by loosing this weight I have had on me for 2yrs. I had gained weight back in 03. then lost it in in 04'....gained some back in 05..lost it again. Since 2006 it has been a steady increase. I have no reason except personal problems and laziness. I am trying to keep up on beauty routines like face masks, eyebrow plucking, pedicures things of those nature. So I made a notebook of things to do for the next 6 months. One notebook for weight loos, working out and diet. The other for BEAUTY stuff. Do micro-dermabrasion once a month, scrub feet once a week(I go barefoot a lot need to not let them get rough), pluck eyebrows every two weeks. I HATE PLUCKING...I have had my eyebrows waxed every 3 weeks for the last almost 5yrs. I sneeze and my eyes water up, I feel I make them to thin. But over here cost in EURO and have not found someone I trust. Anyways that is just a little bit of the "planner" in me. With sections on each notebook to write when I did them, how I felt about getting them done. Lame right?
I also decided to quit the bank job I got here only two weeks after being here. I am sick of just working for a good paycheck. I am 26 with not ONE college class under my belt. When I turned 18 I said 1yr off work and have fun then go back to school. I had some stuff happen in 2001(1yr after graduating) that really threw my life out of whack for a year and half. SO yeah that is reasonable reason. After that....nothing. But I am sick of feeling not good enough for anyone. I have friends that I look upon with admiration and just love their dedication to better themselves. I should have had my degree by now.
I talked it over long and hard with my hubby, I can not work full time, go to school full time and loose weight like I need too. You can scoff and say "people do it all the time" BUT I don't just need to loose weight to be toned. It is for health reason..those who have seen me this last year KNOW THAT TOO. I am totally comfortable saying that too. So I am going to work part time and go to school full time while fixing my health. I have been applying at the school for substitute teacher and a few others. I have been getting school things ready, applying for loans, grants..etc BUT CAME TO A SCREECHING Halt. See the problem is I NEVER TOOK MY SAT's. LMAO... I totally forgot about that until I was going to go to the Education Office to get further along in my enrollment. I went to an alternative high school my senior year. Due to that I was 5.75 credits behind, plus my regular Senior year. Well I took extra classes and did correspondence work in order to walk with my class. I GOT IT DONE even when teachers told me to go easy and just graduate in the summer. =( NO WAY I DID IT...well in order to do that I went to the alt. High School because Murray High School charged 60 bucks for every .25 credit you made up.......um mom being on welfare and not working did not fit getting that done. So I did what I had to do as I always did then and still do now. So they never gave us the SAT's. Those who are close to me know why I was behind that many credits. I now need to go and get material and study for Sat's and take them. Going to be weird doing that but what can I do?? Eh? So yeah that is what I am feeling accomplished about. I am finding things out, keeping house clean, working out, dieting, DOING WHAT I SAID I WOULD DO. I love that.....
Phew...that turned into a rant and ramble right?? Well I just wanted to say why I was tired..just getting things done. I am supposed to go to Ryon's football game tonight, he is not there though. That is kinda taking away my motivation to do so. He is in Italy and is hating it. Not Italy but the dorms he is in and stuff. I have not spoken to him for more than 10mins in the last 3 days. I am seriously going to think of switching to a paid cell plan. This pre-paid shit cost waaaaaay to much for a cell phone.
I will cut this off for now and quit boring anyone who is reading...maybe go get to more of what is on my wonderful lists? hahahahahaha
Eli’s First Single is Out!
1 week ago
3 comments:
bridgette i am so glad you are on here! i love having this as a place to vent and get my feelings and frustrations out. anyway i will be reading yours too now, and thank you for reading mine! :) you rock girlie, and good luck with all your lists!
I am very proud of you. You are getting things done! Just keep it up and stay motivated. I am sure you will be fine. I am glad you will get this time to do what you have always wanted or feel you need to do to be happy! Your lists are not lame. It is easy to see on paper when you can cross things out and feel accomplished. I once read if you cross things out on your list with an orange marker the color orange is suppose to make you feel even more accomplished? Who knew. So I do it anyways :) -Buttercup
PS How do I get my pick and name to come up like Lisa if I am on blogger too?
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